1
00:00:02,603 --> 00:00:04,072
Tone, there you are man.

2
00:00:04,105 --> 00:00:05,673
Hey look,

3
00:00:05,706 --> 00:00:09,410
Lisa said dinner be ready
in 15 minutes, okay?
And just so there's no mistake,

4
00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:11,212
I called dibs on a
big piece of chicken.

5
00:00:11,245 --> 00:00:12,446
Thought you should know.

6
00:00:12,480 --> 00:00:13,947
Donnie, if you even
touch my chicken,

7
00:00:13,981 --> 00:00:16,717
I'ma give you a two
piece special with a
broken leg and thigh.

8
00:00:16,750 --> 00:00:17,818
[Laughter]

9
00:00:17,851 --> 00:00:20,254
Fair enough, at least
I have my drumstick.

10
00:00:21,455 --> 00:00:24,158
Oh! Are these all the
colleges that Ebony got into?

11
00:00:24,192 --> 00:00:25,559
[Sighs]

12
00:00:25,593 --> 00:00:27,595
It's stuff like this that uh...

13
00:00:28,296 --> 00:00:31,132
makes me happy that all
the hard work I put into
her was worth it, man.

14
00:00:31,165 --> 00:00:32,900
Man, gimme these!

15
00:00:32,933 --> 00:00:36,270
Look, I'm actually thinking
about going back to school,
these pamphlets are for me.

16
00:00:36,304 --> 00:00:37,805
Oh, I get it.

17
00:00:37,838 --> 00:00:41,275
You tryin' to get in on
those building contracts
out on campus, huh?

18
00:00:41,309 --> 00:00:43,844
See, that's why you're the
smart one swingin' us two there.

19
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:47,014
Probably got that 14 IQ.

20
00:00:47,047 --> 00:00:49,117
Donnie, have your parents
ever asked you to run away?

21
00:00:49,150 --> 00:00:50,418
[Laughter]

22
00:00:50,451 --> 00:00:53,454
Listen I never got the chance to
embrace the college experience.

23
00:00:53,487 --> 00:00:55,423
You're never too old
to learn something
new, so I figured hey,

24
00:00:55,456 --> 00:00:56,824
college is the perfect
place to do it.

25
00:00:56,857 --> 00:01:00,128
Okay, uh, let's take a look at
the life of a college student.

26
00:01:00,161 --> 00:01:03,731
Are you really ready to
resort to a diet of noodles
and struggle puffs?

27
00:01:04,532 --> 00:01:05,933
What are struggle puffs?

28
00:01:05,966 --> 00:01:08,001
That's when you pour
water in your cereal cuz
you can't afford milk.

29
00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:09,637
[Laughter]

30
00:01:09,670 --> 00:01:11,672
That's the life of a college
freshman man, are you sure
that's what you want?

31
00:01:11,705 --> 00:01:13,141
Well, no.

32
00:01:13,174 --> 00:01:15,776
Oh! Plus, anything you
want to know nowadays,
you can just look up.

33
00:01:15,809 --> 00:01:19,113
Man, Google U is the
best college out there.

34
00:01:19,147 --> 00:01:21,815
[Donnie Chuckles]
Plus it's got an
acceptance rate of 100%.

35
00:01:21,849 --> 00:01:23,184
I had to drop out though, cuz

36
00:01:23,217 --> 00:01:24,885
My internet got cut off.

37
00:01:25,486 --> 00:01:27,521
* Woke up and my wife said to me

38
00:01:27,555 --> 00:01:30,158
* The bill collectors
want their fees

39
00:01:30,191 --> 00:01:32,226
* The kids keep
talking back to me

40
00:01:32,260 --> 00:01:33,994
* Family time

41
00:01:34,027 --> 00:01:38,666
* Family Time,
Family Time, Family Time

42
00:01:40,868 --> 00:01:43,404
I just got a new security system
installed in my house,

43
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:44,905
I have never felt.

44
00:01:44,938 --> 00:01:47,241
Yeah but, aren't
those expensive?

45
00:01:47,275 --> 00:01:49,543
No, this one was really cheap.

46
00:01:49,577 --> 00:01:52,012
Basically it's just a
recording of a couple arguing,

47
00:01:52,045 --> 00:01:54,515
that way it always
sounds like there's
someone bickering at home.

48
00:01:54,548 --> 00:01:56,817
- That, that'll scare
anyone away.
- Right?

49
00:01:56,850 --> 00:01:59,787
Oh, Cheryl, don't you
miss being in a couple?

50
00:02:01,222 --> 00:02:02,690
Hmm.

51
00:02:02,723 --> 00:02:05,125
Yeah, I guess I do.

52
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,229
Minus the lying
and the cheating, and

53
00:02:08,262 --> 00:02:09,863
random girls calling
me and saying like,

54
00:02:09,897 --> 00:02:13,033
"that's my husband," you know,
the random backstabbing.
[Laughter]

55
00:02:13,066 --> 00:02:16,170
- Yeah. Don't miss that.
- Yeah.

56
00:02:16,204 --> 00:02:17,405
What's up, y'all?

57
00:02:17,438 --> 00:02:19,607
Lisa, you got any of that bitter
ass coffee you usually make?

58
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:23,677
Uh, you mean the free
coffee that matches your
bitter ass attitude?

59
00:02:23,711 --> 00:02:25,346
Whatever, Lisa.

60
00:02:25,379 --> 00:02:26,747
What you two talkin' about?

61
00:02:26,780 --> 00:02:28,949
Uh, Cheryl's fake
ass security system.

62
00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:31,385
Excuse me, it works very well.

63
00:02:31,419 --> 00:02:33,854
No, we're really just
enjoying the peace and quiet.

64
00:02:33,887 --> 00:02:35,423
Tony's not here,

65
00:02:35,456 --> 00:02:40,561
Oh, did he finally go out for
ice cream and is never
coming back? Hallelujah!

66
00:02:40,594 --> 00:02:43,697
No, he went to work
to pay for Devin's tuition.

67
00:02:43,731 --> 00:02:45,733
Ah, that makes sense.
When's Devin leaving?

68
00:02:45,766 --> 00:02:47,568
What you talkin' about?
Devin's already at school.

69
00:02:47,601 --> 00:02:51,038
Are you sure? 'Cuz I could
have swore I saw him right
by my hair salon this morning.

70
00:02:51,071 --> 00:02:53,374
Not my baby. My Devin is at

71
00:02:53,407 --> 00:02:55,643
school, 3000 miles away.

72
00:02:55,676 --> 00:02:56,744
That's a trip.

73
00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:58,646
'Cause this kid had the
same style and everything.

74
00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:01,549
Hmm, well Devin just
texted me from a study group.

75
00:03:01,582 --> 00:03:04,051
So? My boss thinks
I'm at home sick.
[Laughter]

76
00:03:04,084 --> 00:03:07,721
Listen, all the kids these
days dress the same,
have the same haircuts.

77
00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:08,822
Yeah.

78
00:03:08,856 --> 00:03:11,459
Yeah, alright. I guess,
I guess Devin is at school.

79
00:03:11,492 --> 00:03:13,627
Yeah. You know they
say everyone has a twin.

80
00:03:13,661 --> 00:03:17,731
People tell me I look like that
little sexy flight attendant
from "Soul Plane" all the time.

81
00:03:17,765 --> 00:03:20,268
Hmm. I don't see that.

82
00:03:20,301 --> 00:03:22,436
[Instrumental Music]

83
00:03:22,470 --> 00:03:23,771
Yo.

84
00:03:23,804 --> 00:03:24,872
Hey, Tone!

85
00:03:24,905 --> 00:03:26,507
I have somebody that I
would love for you to meet.

86
00:03:26,540 --> 00:03:28,276
This is my new lady, Tasha.

87
00:03:28,309 --> 00:03:31,612
Tasha, this is my good friend
and business partner Tony.

88
00:03:31,645 --> 00:03:34,648
Uh, Tony, I don't want
to talk about the paperwork
for that billion dollar

89
00:03:34,682 --> 00:03:36,317
development deal, okay?

90
00:03:36,350 --> 00:03:37,951
- We'll talk about that later.
- Right.

91
00:03:37,985 --> 00:03:39,787
It's very nice to meet you,
Tony.

92
00:03:39,820 --> 00:03:41,955
- I've heard nothing but
great things about you.
- Oh.

93
00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:45,426
And I must say, it's always
good to support a
black owned business.

94
00:03:45,459 --> 00:03:48,762
Well I agree. It is nice
to meet you as well.

95
00:03:48,796 --> 00:03:50,264
Would you happen to have
a restroom I could use?

96
00:03:50,298 --> 00:03:51,299
It was a long drive.

97
00:03:51,332 --> 00:03:53,867
Sure, it's right down the hall.

98
00:03:53,901 --> 00:03:55,636
There you go.

99
00:03:55,669 --> 00:03:57,170
- Grab it.
- Put the purse down.

100
00:03:57,204 --> 00:03:59,307
- Thank, thank you, thank you.
- Mm-hmm. Yup.

101
00:03:59,340 --> 00:04:02,042
- Lift with your back.
- Bend your knees.

102
00:04:02,510 --> 00:04:05,045
[Chuckling]

103
00:04:05,078 --> 00:04:07,481
[Audience Laughs]

104
00:04:07,515 --> 00:04:09,517
- Hey, what you think man?
- Bro!

105
00:04:09,550 --> 00:04:10,484
Boy, how did you pull that?

106
00:04:10,518 --> 00:04:12,620
Oh, by her hair.
[Audience Laughs]

107
00:04:12,653 --> 00:04:14,388
You don't want to tell me,
that's fine, that's fine.

108
00:04:14,422 --> 00:04:15,789
Really man, by her hair.

109
00:04:15,823 --> 00:04:17,325
See it got caught
in a bicycle chain,

110
00:04:17,358 --> 00:04:20,328
I pulled it out, and we been
rollin' together ever since.

111
00:04:20,694 --> 00:04:22,863
Well I'm very happy for you
brother, congratulations.

112
00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:23,864
Appreciate that.

113
00:04:23,897 --> 00:04:26,567
She's the CEO of a
Fortune 500 company, man.

114
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,869
- What?
- I think she might be the one.

115
00:04:28,902 --> 00:04:30,338
- She's a CEO?
- Yeah.

116
00:04:30,371 --> 00:04:32,340
Brother, you better go in that
bathroom right now and propose.

117
00:04:32,373 --> 00:04:34,107
She might be the one for real.

118
00:04:34,542 --> 00:04:37,411
Yeah but it's uh,
it's just one thing.

119
00:04:37,445 --> 00:04:38,412
She used to be a man.

120
00:04:38,446 --> 00:04:39,813
It's fine, it's fine,
we can overlook that.

121
00:04:39,847 --> 00:04:41,081
She is the CEO!

122
00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:43,083
Na-nah, man, nothing like that.

123
00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:46,153
I been gettin' a lot of
threatenin' messages
to leave her alone.

124
00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:49,189
Hate to tell you this bro,
but that, that's a
crazy ex right there.

125
00:04:49,222 --> 00:04:51,024
- You think so?
- Oh yeah, for sure.

126
00:04:51,058 --> 00:04:52,025
What'd the letter say?

127
00:04:52,059 --> 00:04:54,828
"Stay away from
Tasha or that's yo ass!"

128
00:04:54,862 --> 00:04:56,697
It's a whole bunch
of emojis after that.

129
00:04:56,730 --> 00:04:58,265
But I've never even seen it.

130
00:04:58,298 --> 00:04:59,833
Definitely. Crazy ex.

131
00:04:59,867 --> 00:05:02,370
You know what? It probably
is some young thundercat
she used to deal with.

132
00:05:02,403 --> 00:05:04,338
They only talk in emojis.

133
00:05:04,372 --> 00:05:05,673
Hey, Donnie.

134
00:05:05,706 --> 00:05:06,940
Ready to go?

135
00:05:06,974 --> 00:05:08,041
Is it safe?

136
00:05:08,075 --> 00:05:09,242
[Laughing] Of course!

137
00:05:09,777 --> 00:05:12,413
I'm driving, we're
not riding bikes.

138
00:05:12,446 --> 00:05:14,081
And where are you
lovebirds off to?

139
00:05:14,114 --> 00:05:15,716
Ah, we're going to
see this new play

140
00:05:15,749 --> 00:05:17,418
it's called "Who
Brought the Neck Bones?"

141
00:05:17,451 --> 00:05:19,887
It's a love story about
an interracial couples'

142
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:22,556
first black Thanksgiving.

143
00:05:22,590 --> 00:05:24,725
- Tyler Perry?
- Of course.

144
00:05:24,758 --> 00:05:27,528
[Instrumental Music]

145
00:05:27,561 --> 00:05:29,730
Uh, did you take
my coconut water?

146
00:05:29,763 --> 00:05:31,231
Uh, nope.

147
00:05:31,264 --> 00:05:35,936
Well, I know I put it in here
earlier, and Ebony hasn't
been home, so...

148
00:05:35,969 --> 00:05:37,405
Yeah.

149
00:05:37,438 --> 00:05:38,706
What you tryin' to say?

150
00:05:38,739 --> 00:05:40,408
I want my coconut water.

151
00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:43,276
Well then you need to go on
down to the store and get
it. I think it's on aisle 3.

152
00:05:43,310 --> 00:05:44,712
[Stammers]
[Laughter]

153
00:05:44,745 --> 00:05:46,814
You took my coconut water, Tony.

154
00:05:46,847 --> 00:05:48,749
That's how you
know it's on aisle 3.

155
00:05:48,782 --> 00:05:51,752
Baby, I'm from the other
side of the tracks, okay?

156
00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:55,322
We drink 40's and dark liquor,
you know what I'm talkin'
about? Knock it off.

157
00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:56,890
Yeah, well...

158
00:05:56,924 --> 00:05:59,092
Look, the only people that
like that is you and Devin.

159
00:05:59,126 --> 00:06:01,595
Oh, speaking of Devin, um,
have you spoken to him?

160
00:06:01,629 --> 00:06:03,397
Mm, nope. Why?

161
00:06:03,431 --> 00:06:07,668
I know it sounds a little crazy,
but Rachel said she saw somebody
that looked just like him.

162
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:10,303
Please, people say that
all the time about
me and Idris Elba.

163
00:06:10,337 --> 00:06:12,272
[Audience Laughs]

164
00:06:12,305 --> 00:06:15,108
It happened once.
It was dark, and,
whatever! What's your point?

165
00:06:15,142 --> 00:06:16,510
Yeah, um,

166
00:06:16,544 --> 00:06:18,946
yeah, I, I actually saw
somebody that looked
like him too, so it's

167
00:06:18,979 --> 00:06:20,313
a little weird.

168
00:06:20,347 --> 00:06:22,783
Okay, y'all need to
swear off whatever it
was y'all drinking.

169
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,317
Wait, you know what?

170
00:06:24,351 --> 00:06:25,653
I did see him.

171
00:06:25,686 --> 00:06:27,320
Really Tony? Where?

172
00:06:27,354 --> 00:06:30,458
By the door when we said
goodbye to the boy 8 months
ago and sent him off to college!

173
00:06:32,025 --> 00:06:34,795
So you, you a smart ass. Okay.

174
00:06:34,828 --> 00:06:36,864
Let's see you hold out
for 8 months, huh?

175
00:06:36,897 --> 00:06:39,266
Hold out? It ain't
nothin' but a word, girl.

176
00:06:39,299 --> 00:06:41,469
8 months, I... 8 months?

177
00:06:41,502 --> 00:06:42,936
Hey, criminals don't
get that long, Lisa.

178
00:06:42,970 --> 00:06:44,872
Can I at least get probation?
[Instrumental Music]

179
00:06:45,172 --> 00:06:47,240
[Instrumental Music]
[Singing to Self]

180
00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:53,046
Good morning Mr.
Stallworth, how you doin'?

181
00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:55,849
- I'm well, how are you?
- I am doing wonderful.

182
00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:58,418
Wait a minute, who are you,
and where the hell is Melinda?

183
00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:03,190
Dang, you just came in here.
You sure is throwin' a lot of
questions at a sister.

184
00:07:03,223 --> 00:07:05,125
Okay, let's just start
with one question.

185
00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:06,494
Where's Melinda?

186
00:07:06,527 --> 00:07:10,130
Okay well, Melinda's
going to be gone for
a very, very long time.

187
00:07:10,163 --> 00:07:15,068
See, she got flown out
by one of them uh, sheiks
going to Dubai, so uh,

188
00:07:15,102 --> 00:07:18,071
I guarantee she going to be wife
number 7. It's fine, it's fine.

189
00:07:18,105 --> 00:07:21,074
Wait, Dubai? She
didn't even say goodbye.

190
00:07:21,509 --> 00:07:23,243
Why are you here?

191
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,579
I'm Melinda's cousin, Brandy.

192
00:07:25,613 --> 00:07:26,847
Nice to meet you.

193
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:28,649
I'm also her replacement.

194
00:07:28,682 --> 00:07:33,153
Yeah, see, I interviewed
a couple other girls for
the position this morning

195
00:07:33,186 --> 00:07:35,589
and I figured I'm
best for the job.

196
00:07:35,623 --> 00:07:38,659
Okay, first of all sweetheart,
that's not how it works.

197
00:07:38,692 --> 00:07:41,695
Now how you going to
be my assistant, but you don't
know anything about me?

198
00:07:41,729 --> 00:07:43,396
Mr. Stallworth...

199
00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:46,366
Don't you ever underestimate a
black woman and her knowing.

200
00:07:46,399 --> 00:07:48,101
I know everything
about you, okay?

201
00:07:48,135 --> 00:07:52,005
I know that you like coffee with
two sugars and one cream.

202
00:07:52,039 --> 00:07:55,042
I know that you a Libra
with Scorpio tendencies.

203
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:56,343
You might want to work on that.

204
00:07:56,376 --> 00:07:59,680
Your mother's name is
Beverly, oh, and your wife...

205
00:07:59,713 --> 00:08:03,016
I sent her flowers this morning.
Just because.

206
00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:05,318
- You welcome.
- Wow.

207
00:08:05,919 --> 00:08:07,354
You've been here 5minutes and

208
00:08:07,387 --> 00:08:09,690
you've already done more
than Melinda did in four years.

209
00:08:09,723 --> 00:08:11,191
5 minutes?

210
00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:15,062
Mr. Stallworth, I have
been here since 6 am!

211
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:18,231
Come on baby, somebody got to
wake the roofers up around here.

212
00:08:18,732 --> 00:08:20,934
Okay well, how do I know
that you're not a criminal?

213
00:08:20,968 --> 00:08:24,404
I never said I
wasn't a criminal.

214
00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:25,939
Everybody gotta pay.

215
00:08:25,973 --> 00:08:29,610
Okay, well you know, I could
use the help around here.

216
00:08:29,643 --> 00:08:30,811
- Do I get a job?
- You're hired.

217
00:08:30,844 --> 00:08:31,545
Oh, yes!

218
00:08:31,579 --> 00:08:32,880
Uh, but only on a

219
00:08:32,913 --> 00:08:36,083
probationary basis, I'm
sure you're used to that.
[Laughter]

220
00:08:36,116 --> 00:08:37,317
Okay. Well, well, well, well...

221
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,620
Thank you, Mr. Stallworth, I'm
not going to let you down.

222
00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:42,422
And by the way,
I thought your son

223
00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:43,591
was away at school.

224
00:08:43,624 --> 00:08:45,058
He is.

225
00:08:45,092 --> 00:08:48,562
See, that's funny,
because I follow him on
Funstagram, and I could have

226
00:08:48,596 --> 00:08:51,565
swore I seen that boy down
at the Carlton's Junior.

227
00:08:51,599 --> 00:08:54,134
What is it with everybody
swearing they've seen this boy

228
00:08:54,167 --> 00:08:56,103
when he's on the other
side of the country?

229
00:08:56,136 --> 00:08:58,471
Okay, did you get a
good look at his face?

230
00:08:58,505 --> 00:09:00,407
[Grunting]

231
00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,476
You know what? Let me
put your mind at ease.

232
00:09:03,510 --> 00:09:04,511
- Yeah, do it,
- Call him right now.

233
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:07,514
Call him right now,
I wanna hear.

234
00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:09,416
[Audience Laughs]

235
00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:10,483
[Devin] Oh, what's up Dad?

236
00:09:10,517 --> 00:09:12,019
Just on my way to class.

237
00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:15,022
Ah, good. I'm just checking
to make sure you where
you're supposed to be.

238
00:09:15,055 --> 00:09:16,790
- Carry on.
- Mm-hmm.

239
00:09:16,824 --> 00:09:18,125
[Audience Laughs]

240
00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:23,463
Tone, things are getting worse
man. I found this in my car.

241
00:09:23,496 --> 00:09:25,766
It coulda shattered
my whole window.

242
00:09:25,799 --> 00:09:27,668
You think that's
from Tasha's ex?

243
00:09:27,701 --> 00:09:31,605
Or did you just throw the brick
in the window, trying to get
some insurance money?

244
00:09:31,639 --> 00:09:33,774
You look like the type.
[Laughter]

245
00:09:33,807 --> 00:09:36,476
What in the Tardy B,
who the hell are you?

246
00:09:36,810 --> 00:09:38,378
First off, I am Brandy.

247
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,447
And you must be Donnie.

248
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:41,548
- She heard about your boy.

249
00:09:41,581 --> 00:09:42,883
Yeah, Melinda told
me all about you,

250
00:09:42,916 --> 00:09:46,219
said you was real
thirsty!
[Laughter]

251
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:50,624
For the record, Melinda just
couldn't quench my thirst.

252
00:09:50,658 --> 00:09:53,593
And by the way man, I know
it's from her ex. Peep this.

253
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,965
"Dear Donnie the Deadman,
[Audience Laughs]

254
00:09:57,998 --> 00:10:00,868
I see you've ignored my
advice on leaving Tasha alone,

255
00:10:00,901 --> 00:10:05,505
leaving me no other choice
but the punch your nose out
the back of your cranium.

256
00:10:05,538 --> 00:10:07,540
I'm not playing with you Donnie.

257
00:10:07,574 --> 00:10:10,377
I'm going to fold your
ass like a CVS receipt."

258
00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:12,145
Ooh, that's crazy.

259
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:13,981
Last time somebody folded me up,

260
00:10:14,014 --> 00:10:15,749
I had to go see a chiropractor.

261
00:10:16,283 --> 00:10:18,318
Well I think you got bigger
problems than that, Donnie.

262
00:10:18,351 --> 00:10:21,989
This is definitely an
angry ex move right here.
I know all too well.

263
00:10:22,022 --> 00:10:24,825
I mean, have you
spoke to Tasha about

264
00:10:24,858 --> 00:10:27,060
the whole threatening ex thing?

265
00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:28,996
Uh, I actually been holding off.

266
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,998
I thought it was from like,
one of her competitors

267
00:10:31,031 --> 00:10:32,866
that was trying to
knock her off her game.

268
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:34,668
Tell you right now
Donnie, that ain't it.

269
00:10:34,702 --> 00:10:38,038
I think it's time you have
that conversation with Tasha.

270
00:10:38,638 --> 00:10:40,207
[Donnie Chuckles]

271
00:10:40,708 --> 00:10:42,776
[Instrumental Music]

272
00:10:42,810 --> 00:10:44,778
Whoo! I can't
remember the last time

273
00:10:44,812 --> 00:10:46,714
we were able to
just enjoy our jacuzzi.

274
00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:48,015
You know, without any-

275
00:10:48,048 --> 00:10:49,516
[Cheryl] Yoo hoo!
- Aww...

276
00:10:49,549 --> 00:10:52,652
Stallworths, oh, I'm sorry
for the interruption,
but we need to talk

277
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:54,722
What's up, Cheryl?

278
00:10:55,555 --> 00:10:58,291
These past few nights
I have seen a man

279
00:10:58,325 --> 00:10:59,559
sneaking around our block.

280
00:10:59,592 --> 00:11:01,628
He moves like a big raccoon.

281
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:03,196
I'm sorry, this is serious.

282
00:11:03,230 --> 00:11:05,032
I think we need to start
the neighborhood watch again.

283
00:11:05,065 --> 00:11:07,400
Okay um. we haven't
noticed anything missing,

284
00:11:07,434 --> 00:11:10,037
but if you feel like it's
necessary, we're on board.

285
00:11:10,070 --> 00:11:11,038
We are?

286
00:11:11,071 --> 00:11:11,939
Oh, good.

287
00:11:11,972 --> 00:11:13,273
I'm so glad to hear
that because Tony,

288
00:11:13,306 --> 00:11:15,542
I think that you need to
take the first few night shifts.

289
00:11:15,575 --> 00:11:17,911
Oh no, no, no, I'm not getting
involved in that again, no. No.

290
00:11:17,945 --> 00:11:20,580
But Tony, how else are we
going to keep this neighborhood
safe from burglars?

291
00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:22,082
We need you.

292
00:11:22,115 --> 00:11:24,251
Okay so, you know what?
If you, if you do decide

293
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:27,988
to go through with the
neighborhood watch, we
are more than willing to help.

294
00:11:28,021 --> 00:11:29,757
No, we are not! Babe,
I'm not doing that.

295
00:11:29,790 --> 00:11:30,557
Not a chance.

296
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:31,491
8 months, Tony.

297
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:34,127
Aw, damnit woman,
you ain't playin' fair.

298
00:11:34,161 --> 00:11:35,595
Thank you, Lisa.

299
00:11:35,628 --> 00:11:38,098
I will see you later, Lisa.

300
00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:41,068
Alright, let's get
up in this thang.

301
00:11:41,101 --> 00:11:42,635
Heat them cakes up, you
know what I'm talkin' about?

302
00:11:42,669 --> 00:11:44,237
Shake them cakes, baby!

303
00:11:44,271 --> 00:11:46,006
[Instrumental Music]

304
00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,674
- Is everything alright?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

305
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:50,077
you've kinda been
acting weird all night.

306
00:11:50,110 --> 00:11:52,112
Yes, everything's
good, you know.

307
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:54,915
Alright look,
everything's not okay.

308
00:11:54,948 --> 00:11:57,250
Alright? I've been getting
a lot of threats
from one of your ex's.

309
00:11:57,284 --> 00:11:59,086
One of my ex's? Who?

310
00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:01,621
I don't know, ain't
like he left his name,
or something like that.

311
00:12:01,654 --> 00:12:05,258
He just said if I didn't stop
seeing you, he would decapitate
me with one punch.

312
00:12:05,292 --> 00:12:07,460
And based on his
detailed description,

313
00:12:07,494 --> 00:12:09,096
I don't think this
is his first rodeo.

314
00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:11,264
I haven't even posted
you online or anything,

315
00:12:11,298 --> 00:12:14,134
so I don't know how
any of my ex's would've
found out about us.

316
00:12:14,167 --> 00:12:16,703
I don't know how, but he does.

317
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,271
What did he sound like
when you talked to him?

318
00:12:18,305 --> 00:12:19,973
Oh, I didn't talk to
him on the phone.

319
00:12:20,007 --> 00:12:21,608
Hell nah, no, so,

320
00:12:21,641 --> 00:12:23,877
he's been leaving a lot of

321
00:12:23,911 --> 00:12:25,979
threatening letters in my mail.

322
00:12:26,013 --> 00:12:29,716
Talkin' 'bout if I don't
stop seeing you, then
he's gon' hurt me, and

323
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,351
look, he just
got real bold lately.

324
00:12:31,384 --> 00:12:32,820
Okay? He got so aggressive,

325
00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:35,622
he threw a brick
through my car window
with this letter attached.

326
00:12:35,655 --> 00:12:38,591
Let me see that.

327
00:12:40,527 --> 00:12:42,529
Any idea who it's from?
[Tasha Laughs]

328
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:45,532
[Both Laughing]

329
00:12:50,003 --> 00:12:51,704
You want to let me
in on the punchline

330
00:12:51,738 --> 00:12:54,174
that doesn't involve my
head being taken off?

331
00:12:54,207 --> 00:12:56,910
This is not good.

332
00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:58,478
It's Elijah.

333
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:00,180
Aw, the honorable Elijah?

334
00:13:00,213 --> 00:13:01,748
Bean pies and bowties?

335
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:04,751
No, worse.

336
00:13:05,185 --> 00:13:10,190
I'm too young to die, but you
know, if it come down to it,
I'll ride or die for mine.

337
00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:12,025
I'll just have to face
him man-to-man.

338
00:13:12,059 --> 00:13:16,029
Donnie... Elijah is
my 11 year old son.

339
00:13:16,063 --> 00:13:19,432
[Chuckles] I could whup his ass.

340
00:13:19,466 --> 00:13:22,035
I mean uh, how do you
know that it's from him?

341
00:13:22,069 --> 00:13:24,171
I can tell by the
emojis he used.

342
00:13:24,204 --> 00:13:27,174
He always puts them
at the front of what he's
writing and at the end.

343
00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:29,442
Text messages, Funstagram file,

344
00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:31,778
it's kind of like his trademark.

345
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:33,280
But your son is 11.

346
00:13:33,313 --> 00:13:36,917
These letters come from
somebody that is a
valedictorian turned assassin.

347
00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:40,954
Shoot, all that money
I pay for private school, his
vocabulary better be incredible.

348
00:13:40,988 --> 00:13:43,023
No matter what he's doing.

349
00:13:43,056 --> 00:13:44,391
I can respect that.

350
00:13:44,424 --> 00:13:46,426
Look, he's a good kid.

351
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:48,028
He just doesn't
know you like that

352
00:13:48,061 --> 00:13:50,263
and feels threatened because
you're seeing his mother.

353
00:13:51,098 --> 00:13:53,033
Maybe you two
should do some bonding.

354
00:13:53,066 --> 00:13:56,036
I think that would really help.

355
00:13:56,069 --> 00:13:59,072
And maybe...

356
00:13:59,106 --> 00:14:02,876
you and I can do
some bonding, too.

357
00:14:02,910 --> 00:14:07,280
Hey, you know, I, I,
I, I, I, I, I, I would
love that, you know.

358
00:14:07,314 --> 00:14:08,648
Don, Donnie love the kids.

359
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,583
[Instrumental Music]

360
00:14:10,617 --> 00:14:11,952
[Instrumental Music]

361
00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:14,121
Lisa I'm telling you, I know

362
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:15,722
I saw Devin. I know my nephew.

363
00:14:15,755 --> 00:14:19,126
Okay, you might want
to slow down on
those glasses of wine.

364
00:14:19,159 --> 00:14:20,961
- Seriously.
- Whatever.
- Um...

365
00:14:20,994 --> 00:14:24,131
Lisa, I mean didn't you say
you also saw him when you
went to the store the other day?

366
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:25,966
I said I thought I saw him.

367
00:14:25,999 --> 00:14:27,667
And Cheryl saw
him yesterday, too.

368
00:14:27,700 --> 00:14:30,237
Huh? So it' snot just me.

369
00:14:30,270 --> 00:14:32,639
[Sighs] I did, Lisa, I did.

370
00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:34,507
When I was getting my
son's haircut, I look up-

371
00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:37,744
Aren't your kids in boarding
school or something?

372
00:14:37,777 --> 00:14:40,480
Um, Simon, my son.

373
00:14:40,513 --> 00:14:41,648
[Laughter]

374
00:14:41,681 --> 00:14:44,617
My cocker spaniel,
I got him from the shelter.

375
00:14:44,651 --> 00:14:46,686
See, that's that
white people thing.

376
00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:48,088
- Hey, Cheryl.
- Hi.

377
00:14:48,121 --> 00:14:50,457
Huh. I see you
found that raccoon.

378
00:14:50,490 --> 00:14:53,994
[Rachel Chuckles] Shut up,
Sponge Bob SquarePants.

379
00:14:54,027 --> 00:14:55,162
Hey, you know what?
I'm getting tired of you.

380
00:14:55,195 --> 00:14:57,297
Okay? You're like a
fang toothed sea urchin.

381
00:14:57,330 --> 00:14:58,698
You know what?
I'm sick of you, too.

382
00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,333
- What you wanna do?
What you wanna do?
- I want to fight you!

383
00:15:00,367 --> 00:15:02,602
[All Shouting]

384
00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:06,106
Sit it, sit it down,
sit it down. Seriously!

385
00:15:06,139 --> 00:15:09,376
Rachael and Cheryl think they
saw Devin somewhere around town.

386
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:10,843
What is with y'all?

387
00:15:10,877 --> 00:15:14,281
The boy is off at school.
I know you miss him,
okay, but he's gone.

388
00:15:14,314 --> 00:15:16,216
[Knocking]

389
00:15:16,849 --> 00:15:19,919
[Tony] What's going
on around here?

390
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:23,023
Oh, hey Mr. Stallweezy,
how's it goin'?

391
00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:24,491
It's going good.

392
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,693
Just wondering why you
just walking in my house
and Devin ain't here.

393
00:15:26,726 --> 00:15:29,963
Oh, well I just talked to him
last night and I asked him if
I could borrow a couple things

394
00:15:29,997 --> 00:15:31,664
so I'm here to pick 'em up.

395
00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:33,366
Uh, things? What things?

396
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,403
Oh hey, Mrs. Stallweezy!
You look beautiful today.

397
00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:39,039
Okay, okay, 'kay now, don't get
your ass whupped boy, relax.

398
00:15:39,072 --> 00:15:41,508
Calm down, alright, and
tell us what you want.

399
00:15:41,541 --> 00:15:43,343
Answer the question.

400
00:15:43,376 --> 00:15:45,212
[Audience Laughs]

401
00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:47,147
- What was the question again?
- What do you want?

402
00:15:47,180 --> 00:15:49,216
Oh, oh! You know, just
the basics, man. Uh,

403
00:15:49,249 --> 00:15:50,583
couple shirts, uh, some socks.

404
00:15:50,617 --> 00:15:51,684
Maybe some clean drawers?

405
00:15:51,718 --> 00:15:52,819
Ah-ha! Mm-mm.

406
00:15:52,852 --> 00:15:54,087
He ain't got no clean drawers.

407
00:15:54,121 --> 00:15:56,656
You're caught! Spit it out,
spill the beans.
What's going on?

408
00:15:56,689 --> 00:15:58,425
- Yeah Ross, you can tell us.
- Yeah, go on.

409
00:15:58,458 --> 00:16:00,060
See, Devin-
[Glass Shatters]

410
00:16:00,093 --> 00:16:01,728
The hell was that?

411
00:16:01,761 --> 00:16:03,563
- You go first.
- No, no, no! Send Rachel first.

412
00:16:03,596 --> 00:16:05,332
She's expendable.

413
00:16:05,365 --> 00:16:08,301
Devin? Wha?

414
00:16:08,868 --> 00:16:11,604
Hey everybody, how y'all doing?

415
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:13,940
Ha! I told you I saw him.

416
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:18,411
Talkin' 'bout I need to slow
down on the wine. Well me and
my wine is doin' just fine!

417
00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:21,414
In fact, I'm going back to it
right now. Come on, Cheryl.

418
00:16:21,448 --> 00:16:23,716
Oh. Right, okay,
well Devin, it was-

419
00:16:23,750 --> 00:16:26,019
[Rachel] Come on, Cheryl.
- Yup!

420
00:16:26,053 --> 00:16:27,754
Boy, what are you doing here?

421
00:16:27,787 --> 00:16:31,358
Hey, Dad! You look so good.

422
00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:32,725
Have you been losing weight?

423
00:16:32,759 --> 00:16:35,462
You got to keep it up,
they gonna start
calling you "Bony Tony".

424
00:16:35,495 --> 00:16:38,365
- Answer the damn question.
- Okay.

425
00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:40,933
So, I got put on
this thing called

426
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:42,769
academic probation.

427
00:16:42,802 --> 00:16:44,471
It's not that bad.

428
00:16:44,504 --> 00:16:48,108
It's like a F , but
really I see it as a D-.

429
00:16:48,141 --> 00:16:51,078
Okay, sounds like either way
you are failing your classes.

430
00:16:51,111 --> 00:16:52,379
Well, I was having
a little trouble,

431
00:16:52,412 --> 00:16:54,814
so my counselor suggested
that I take a year off.

432
00:16:54,847 --> 00:16:57,817
- A year off?
- That's a lot of time
for a little trouble.

433
00:16:57,850 --> 00:16:59,386
Ah yeah, but uh,

434
00:16:59,419 --> 00:17:01,721
it's better than being
kicked out of school.

435
00:17:01,754 --> 00:17:04,757
Okay, you sneaking around
the house sounds like you
did get kicked out of school.

436
00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:07,127
No, no dad, it's not like that.

437
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:12,499
I went to school, I got caught
up partying, and I kind of
slipped up in my classes.

438
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:15,635
Turns out this thing
happens to a lot of freshmen.

439
00:17:15,668 --> 00:17:17,737
I'm not paying a lot
of freshmen's tuition.

440
00:17:17,770 --> 00:17:19,839
Well my counselor
suggested that I take some

441
00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,241
classes at a JC.

442
00:17:21,274 --> 00:17:23,810
Oh my goodness, we are really
disappointed in you, Devin.

443
00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:24,877
I know, Mom.

444
00:17:24,911 --> 00:17:27,647
But I already enrolled in
Junior College classes,

445
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,349
And I'll really
make it up to you.

446
00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:30,817
You're damn right you will.

447
00:17:30,850 --> 00:17:32,619
And let's be clear,

448
00:17:32,652 --> 00:17:34,654
you better do what you got
to do to get back in at school
I'm paying so much money for.

449
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:36,289
I got you, dad.

450
00:17:36,323 --> 00:17:38,958
And now, find
something to clean this up.

451
00:17:38,991 --> 00:17:41,194
[Tony Scoffs]

452
00:17:41,228 --> 00:17:43,496
I know the
circumstances aren't good,

453
00:17:43,530 --> 00:17:45,965
but I did really miss you guys.

454
00:17:45,998 --> 00:17:47,500
Did you miss this belt?

455
00:17:47,534 --> 00:17:49,802
[Instrumental Music]

456
00:17:49,836 --> 00:17:51,971
Yeah, and I'm like,
"why shouldn't she
play The Little Mermaid?"

457
00:17:52,004 --> 00:17:54,141
[All Laugh]

458
00:17:54,741 --> 00:17:57,043
Hey, Elijah, I love
your shirt, man.

459
00:17:57,076 --> 00:17:57,877
Where'd you get it?

460
00:17:57,910 --> 00:17:59,612
I got it from my
mom's old boyfriend.

461
00:17:59,646 --> 00:18:01,514
He's the head designer
at some big company.

462
00:18:01,548 --> 00:18:03,015
I actually liked him.

463
00:18:03,049 --> 00:18:04,151
Elijah.

464
00:18:04,184 --> 00:18:05,718
What? He asked.

465
00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:07,220
Hey, it's all good, Tasha.

466
00:18:07,254 --> 00:18:09,689
Well you know what
man, he's doing his
thing with those shirts.

467
00:18:09,722 --> 00:18:11,057
[Donnie Chuckling]

468
00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:14,060
I'm glad you two had a chance
to bond over this good food.

469
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:15,895
I'm going to run
to the ladies room,

470
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:18,898
you two play nice.

471
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:21,901
Make sure you wash your hands.

472
00:18:23,035 --> 00:18:25,205
- So, Elijah-
- Donnie...

473
00:18:25,705 --> 00:18:27,039
I just want to say

474
00:18:27,073 --> 00:18:28,208
I'm sorry.

475
00:18:28,241 --> 00:18:29,376
You are?

476
00:18:29,409 --> 00:18:30,743
Yeah.

477
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:33,213
I was being a little
mean with the letters about
you and my mom.

478
00:18:33,246 --> 00:18:34,714
And my window.

479
00:18:34,747 --> 00:18:36,749
I'll need that brick back.

480
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:38,551
Guess I have to charge
that one to the game.

481
00:18:38,585 --> 00:18:40,520
Look Donnie, I'm just trying
to protect my mom.

482
00:18:40,553 --> 00:18:44,391
But, I see how happy
you make her, so...
you're all right with me.

483
00:18:44,424 --> 00:18:47,694
Never thought I need a blessing
from a kid, but uh, thanks man.

484
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:50,096
No problem

485
00:18:51,798 --> 00:18:53,400
You know, I was
against it at first, but

486
00:18:53,433 --> 00:18:55,568
it's gonna be kinda
cool having two dads.

487
00:18:55,602 --> 00:18:57,237
Uh, I'm, could you...

488
00:18:57,270 --> 00:18:59,906
-run that by me again, two dads?
What do you, what do you mean?
- Oh yeah.

489
00:18:59,939 --> 00:19:02,742
My real dad, he's
getting out of jail soon.

490
00:19:02,775 --> 00:19:05,312
And he'll be around,
so, two dads.

491
00:19:05,745 --> 00:19:08,748
Jail, huh? That's...
[Audience Laughs]

492
00:19:08,781 --> 00:19:10,116
That's interesting.

493
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:14,921
Um, hey, Elijah, would
you happen to know
why your dad is in jail?

494
00:19:14,954 --> 00:19:16,122
Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

495
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:18,258
Our mailman, he was
hitting on my mom.

496
00:19:18,291 --> 00:19:19,759
so my dad had to give him a...

497
00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:21,127
special delivery.

498
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,062
[Audience Laughs]
[Donnie Clears HIs Throat]

499
00:19:23,095 --> 00:19:24,797
Man, I am so

500
00:19:24,831 --> 00:19:26,466
sleepy. I got to get
up out of here, man.

501
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:28,034
You're leaving? But...

502
00:19:28,067 --> 00:19:28,968
we haven't had dessert yet.

503
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:31,103
Uh, look, um...

504
00:19:31,137 --> 00:19:33,406
if your dad doesn't make parole,

505
00:19:33,440 --> 00:19:36,476
tell your mom to call me. Hmm?
You take care of yourself man.

506
00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:38,778
[Audience Laughs]
You, too.

507
00:19:38,811 --> 00:19:41,281
Uh, can I get the bill?

508
00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:43,983
Pass that to
that brother, please.

509
00:19:45,652 --> 00:19:47,620
Three hundred dollars?

510
00:19:49,456 --> 00:19:51,057
I got five on it.

511
00:19:51,090 --> 00:19:53,693
[Audience Laughs]

512
00:19:58,331 --> 00:19:59,799
Elijah, again?

513
00:19:59,832 --> 00:20:00,600
[Instrumental Music]

514
00:20:01,133 --> 00:20:02,502
[Instrumental Music]

515
00:20:02,535 --> 00:20:04,404
See? That's why I like her.

516
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:05,972
I know, but she's crazy, though.

517
00:20:06,005 --> 00:20:08,741
Craziness is what fuels
a great reality star!

518
00:20:08,775 --> 00:20:11,544
You know what you,
you know, I coulda
really been a reality star.

519
00:20:11,978 --> 00:20:13,079
Good morning, Brandy.

520
00:20:13,112 --> 00:20:14,581
Oh, good morning,
Mr. Stallworth.

521
00:20:14,614 --> 00:20:17,417
Hey Devin. Wha-what?
Devin, what are you doin' here?

522
00:20:17,450 --> 00:20:20,253
Oh nothing, just some
hood rat things with my friends.

523
00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:21,754
Yes!

524
00:20:21,788 --> 00:20:24,957
By the way, your new temp
is way better than Melinda.

525
00:20:24,991 --> 00:20:28,495
Temp? I told, it permanent
boo-boo, I just told you
I ain't goin' nowhere.

526
00:20:28,528 --> 00:20:32,665
And see Mr. Stallworth, I told
you that was Devin when
I see him the other day.

527
00:20:32,699 --> 00:20:34,100
He been here the whole time.

528
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:36,636
Yeah, yeah, you were
right, alright. Yeah,
I, I get it, I get it.

529
00:20:36,669 --> 00:20:38,104
But uh...

530
00:20:38,137 --> 00:20:40,307
You ain't fittin' to just sit
here for an hour for free.

531
00:20:40,340 --> 00:20:42,475
So uh, huh...

532
00:20:42,509 --> 00:20:44,777
File these papers.

533
00:20:44,811 --> 00:20:47,447
I'll get my money from
last semester somehow.

534
00:20:47,480 --> 00:20:50,116
Gon' kick my feet up
for the day then. Yeah.

535
00:20:50,149 --> 00:20:51,718
[Instrumental Music]